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How Do You Know When You Are In Love?

Writer's picture: Paula WesselmannPaula Wesselmann

My thoughts and feelings about love have grown with a deeper understanding as each decade passes. When we are young, inexperienced, and in a hurry to fall in love, we focus too much on our emotions rather than on a balance of mind and heart. When young, some believe love comes instantly, and confuse a beautiful and intense attraction with one that should run deeper, the ability to connect and communicate. To discuss your feelings and expectations openly with your partner takes courage and maturity. Young love may feel that the truth will disappoint the one they love, but how else do you discover if you are on the same page about the life you want to share?


The experts say the key signs of love are constant thoughts about someone and a deep connection where you feel you can be completely yourself. But are we ever completely ourselves with someone we love? Aren’t there pieces of ourselves that belong solely to us that play no major role in the success of the relationship? Yet you want to be loved for all the different parts of who you are that may differ from your partner. The word “all”, in this case, turns love into a romantic novel. The next sign is the desire for closeness, to enjoy each other’s presence. I agree, but this is where neediness can overwhelm another when certain activities don’t always include you. The gift here is sharing your happiness with another and not depending on them to make you happy. Another sign is feeling safe and secure, trusting your partner completely, and comfortable being vulnerable with them. In any relationship, trust comes with time, when someone proves their love by putting you before themselves, not all the time, but when it counts. I like what Tianna Soto says, “Authentic love is based on far more than chemistry or common interests, genuine is akin to a heartfelt friendship that is infused with passion and intimacy.”


This Valentine’s Day, may each of you feel the love you seek, whether it be new or old, or a memory that comforts the heart and fulfills you.


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©2023 by Paula Wesselmann. Proudly created with Love by Liebe PR.

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